Out of the Blue

{This is a post from my new blogsite. See Luminous Blue if you’d like to read more of my experiences from this past year’s journey with my daughter, interwoven with Elizabeth’s memoir and poetry.}

On Friday, November 4, 2011, my world completely changed. My older daughter Elizabeth, 21 at that time, called me as I was finishing a qi gong class at home.  She was in tears, having trouble breathing and said something was wrong, she was in so much pain she was headed to the Student Health Center again.  I knew it was serious, as this girl doesn’t cry, and has a very high pain threshold. I immediately said I’d meet her there, jumped in the car and tried to center and calm myself as I drove.  As I walked in to find her, the kind doctor was telling her to go to the ER at UMC.  We asked if she could go home, drop off her car and pick up a few things, and he said yes, but not to delay.  He also called ahead and made sure she knew to tell them she was having chest pain, so she’d be seen quickly.  Apparently he had a very good idea that she had mediastinal non-Hodgkins lymphoma from looking at her, as her face and neck were quite swollen, and that a large tumor wrapped around a vein was causing the swelling. She’d been having pain in her right upper chest for weeks that another doctor had been dismissing as allergies, and treating her with prednisone.

We didn’t learn the exact diagnosis until after her biopsy on Monday. However within hours of arriving at the ER, her chest x-ray showed us a large mass in her chest, about the size of her heart, just to the right of it. It was shocking to see. Elizabeth was healthy – she’d rarely been sick, had been treated with homeopathic remedies most of her childhood, ate organic whole foods, was a vegetarian since age 14 and had been a dedicated yoga student much of her life. How could she have a mass the size of her fist in her chest? How could she have cancer?!

Our dear friend Ann Marie, Elizabeth’s doctor, came to sit with us as we waited hours for her be admitted.  I walked outside with her at some point, and started sobbing on her shoulder, “no, no, no, no, no….!” I was worried about all kinds of things, from the cost of the yet unknown treatment and her limited insurance cap, to her being able to complete her semester as a junior at the U of A, to how she would cope emotionally with the diagnosis of cancer, but I did NOT think she would die. That was not in my world of possibilities yet. I couldn’t even imagine my world without Elizabeth.

We were moved very slowly and gently into that reality, and for that I am deeply grateful. For the eleven months we had after this day, nine of them believing and trusting that she would have a full recovery and live a long, healthy life, and the last two months knowing she would die, I am grateful. Every moment was a blessing. She and I did a lifetime of healing in that time, she lived fully and richly, and in the end, she became love itself, showering us all with love, and in a state of grace that I’m blessed to have experienced in this lifetime.

Transitions and Acceptance

Dear Ones,
My older daughter, Elizabeth Blue, made her transition September 23, after a year long journey with cancer, and she did so while being showered with love and in a radiant state of grace. It is heartbreaking and we are finding moments of joy in this time of grieving.

Lucia Maya with Elizabeth Blue

Elizabeth Blue and Lucia Maya

It feels overwhelmingly sad, and when I’m present in each moment I come to a place of peace and acceptance of what is. We are truly blessed to have had this time of graceful passage with her, and for so many of our family and friends to be close by. It does feel like she is at peace, making her way in the realms of those who have recently left this earthly plain.

I will not be scheduling individual clients or classes for the time being.  I have been on hiatus while caring for my daughter, and am now taking some time for my own healing, being with friends and family, and doing some travel.  I have been writing and will be creating a new blog that will incorporate my process over the last year with my daughter, and Elizabeth Blue’s writing as well.

I will begin seeing clients again in November, starting on a part-time basis.

If you are interested in attending our Hawaii retreat, the dates are set for December 6 to 11, and promises to be a deep journey into the Hawaiian healing energies.

I send you all a radiance of love and wish for you a showering of divine grace at this time of collective and personal growth.

blessings and love,

Lucia

Heart-Centered Energy Healing

Heart-Centered Energy Healing

heart centered meditation

My daily practice for over ten years is heart-centering.  I use this as a daily ritual, which helps me to center and open, connecting with the Divine, with my inner guidance and with the heart center – where all is welcome, where the energy of the upper and lower chakras meet and there is no judgment.  I also use it when I’m in a situation where I feel off-balance, or fearful,  or where my ego/emotional self is in control, in a way that is not serving me. It always brings me back to the heart center, to a place of calm, compassionate, grace.

I love this practice because it is simple, anyone can do it, and it is very powerful and effective.

Begin by placing your right hand over your heart chakra and place your left hand over your right, with your thumbs meeting above.  See and feel your crown chakra open, at the top of your head, connecting with the divine energies of the sky, the heavens, the cosmos, the masculine…and now see and feel your root chakra open, at the base of your spine, connecting with the divine energies of the earth, the feminine/nurturing aspects.  Bring these divine energies up from the earth and down from the heavens into your body, meeting at the heart and then flowing down your arms and out your hands.  It then flows back into your heart in a beautiful circle…You can also visualize this energy flowing out your hands to others around the world, or place your hands on another person’s body to send them this healing energy.

The mantra to focus on while doing this are the four qualities of the heart center, as taught to me, and countless others by Dr. Brugh Joy:  Supernal Compassion, Innate Harmony, Healing Presence, Unconditional Love and Selfless Service.  Simply repeating these words, contemplating their truth, and bringing their essence into your being will change your experience of life.